Main Character Energy
Main character energy is a term for living as if the world revolves around you. It is a state of following the philosophical concept of solipsism unconsciously. Solipsism is a formal idea that the individual thinker is only able to believe in his own existence, while he is in skepticism about the existence of any other being as a thinking entity separate from himself. It is a rather extreme philosophical position. Yet, if we soften the idea and consider how this idea applies to individuals who very often focus on themself as the main character in their own personal dramas, we can see a rather common application of this position. Unconsciously or consciously, many people go about their lives believing they are somehow special. There are two sides to the same coin of this main character energy.
Narcissism
The first side is narcissism. In Greek mythology, Narcissus was such a gorgeous demigod that all who looked upon him were enchanted and awestruck with admiration. As the most handsome creature to exist, he would not have any wants, since the privilege of interacting with him would be a great incentive for others to attend to his needs and desires, and attend to him they did. It is when he discovers his reflection that his fate is sealed: the one downfall to his curse is that he falls under his own spell. We see narcissism in the individuals who demand attention and affirmation, who do things to be seen by others, and who replenish their batteries by socializing with others to the point of objectification. When others try to tell them about a story, interaction, or problem, they somehow always manage to relate it to their own experience. What was a shared discussion turns into the narcissist’s show, with the others as the adoring public. The audience is important, because without them the narcissist is left to entertain himself; but it is as if they were drained by an energy vampire after the interaction. The narcissist believes he is providing a service as the life of the party. He is partially correct, since he has put on a show to earn his attention, positive or negative.
Victimhood
The second side is victimhood. Because negative attention is still that sweet, craved for attention that the main character feeds on, the victim easily becomes addicted. Someone stuck in the victimhood mentality necessarily is a bit paranoid. They believe that fate is against them, that they have bad luck, that they are being uniquely targeted by their environment, their companions, or even their own self. In order to always have a complaint or something to blame, they are focused on themself to the detriment of objective thinking and altruism. If the cards are always stacked against them, they consciously or not believe in a card stacker. It is difficult to be around them, since there is always a complaint, maybe even a subtle competition for who has the worst situation if the other tries to empathize with his own experience. The world revolves around the victim in order to make him suffer. The victim loves the attention that pity or sympathy invokes, piling onto the story and amplifying the twists and turns of bad luck taking their toll on the sufferer’s health and well being. The more devastating the story, the more the listener is moved with compassion.
What is the advantage of being a victim?
Blame : when we can claim we are a victim of something ‘other’, we have something ‘other’ to blame for our shortcomings or deficiencies, and therefore we can tell ourselves and others that we are not responsible for our failures, that they are not our fault; we get to deflect responsibility.
Pity : when others see that we are a victim, they pity us and want to help because they would want someone to do the same for them; they may offer us welfare, stand up to a bully, or take a burden from us in compassion.
Recognition : when we are a victim, others want to help us and by doing so they give us their attention, and attention feeds our self-value since they are showing that we are worthy of someone’s time and energy, such as when people take an interest in hearing our story or mending a wound.
Empathy : every human is a victim in some way of fate, of ‘the system’, of someone evil who took advantage of a weakness; but we can use the experience to our advantage to empathize with others who:
-need help recovering from the same trauma : healing
-to tell our story to increase awareness of the injustice and try to change ‘the system’ : reform
-to show our humanity by revealing our imperfections when trying to make connections with others. : mutual recognition